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03 August 2017 by James Makoni Leave a Comment

How to banish the “pre-send” jitters

My grandmother grilled me today.

Thing is, compared to most other Zimbabweans I’m extremely uncultured. In my culture when you greet an elder there is a certain customary greeting you have to go through.

It’s a sign of respect.

It bothered grandma when I couldn’t do any of the customary greetings to my elders ( don’t ask… it’s a Shona thing ). So she sat down with me in the lounge and asked me why I didn’t know.

Admittedly my childhood was way more sheltered than most people’s.

I only started having real friends when I was 11 years old.

Before that I always went straight home after school.

So I never had the “social” and “cultural” exposure most kids had. My biological mom passed away when I was 8 and dad spent a lot of time at work. So for the most part it was Hector the maid and I. The only social circle I had for the most part was Nick, Hector and I. So there wasn’t much to learn because there weren’t scenarios where I needed it.

We rarely got visitors so I never had to learn or practice any of the cultural greetings.

When I explained that to grandma she understood what I meant.

Even the slightly butchered ( though acceptable ) way I speak the mother tongue shows how disconnected I am from my culture. But it’s not THAT bad. People get what I mean.

Granny then asked me to “try” one of the greetings.

To perform one of the greetings you simply clap your hands and greet the elders. The thing is, there’s a certain way to do it. And guess what happened when I demonstrated it…

I shocked grandma by actually knowing how it’s done.

This is when I realised the truth.

It’s not that I don’t know my culture. I’m just so scared of being laughed at and ridiculed if I happen to get it wrong… that I’m much more comfortable NOT doing it in the first place. Can’t screw up if I don’t try right?

WRONG.

The honest truth is, I miss every shot I don’t take. And each time I don’t take the chance to practice is a shot I got wrong.

It’s an irrational fear that stops me.

Back when I was in primary school the usual “game” for my classmates was to make fun of how little I knew about my culture. I was the cultural butt-monkey of every joke in class and those scars still run deep.

I hated being made fun of back then and I hate it even now.

And it’s this same fear that holds many back when they have to execute an email campaign.

I’m sure you know what I mean.

That cold fear that grips you before you hit “send” on your latest email.

The fear of being laughed by your subscribers. The fear of getting the emails wrong and screwing up. The fear of offending someone and losing them as a subscriber.

I should know.

Those fears creep up on me every now and then. I’m human too y’know. Even I use the loo…

And back when I began writing emails the fear was much worse.

But I had to plough forward and get it over with.

The only real way you can screw up a campaign is by not trying at all.

But, if you want to kickstart your next killer email campaign. Or… if you want a kickass email autoresponder sequence to “indoctrinate” new subscribers into your camp of thinking.

And if you want me to give you a guiding hand from the creation of the emails to the implementation, so you can push through that barrier of fear… then go ahead and book a free strategy session with me right now.

Go enter your details here:

https://jaymakoni.com/work-with-me

… and I’ll get back to you shortly

Till the next wave of madness… Vae Victis

Jay

“On with the show”

12 July 2017 by James Makoni Leave a Comment

Make boring common claims sound new without lying

Today my gorgeous baby sister came for a visit.

This was a pretty big deal for me because:

1- I hadn’t seen her in two weeks. But more importantly…

2- She brought me a fine tribute of potato chips.

Now, my sister is trying to build her personal brand on InstaCrap and so far she’s been taking my advice. Especially regarding “Hashtags” and “targeting” and she’s been seeing massive growth from day one.

Now, I’m no InstaCrap master but I do know a thing or two about it.

Moving on the lil sis has a distinct style of putting on her make up where she makes the lipstick on her upper lip darker that the lipstick on the lower lip. Don’t try to picture how it looks… this fashion shit is confusing to me too.

Some people made fun of her for doing that.

While others applauded her sense of originality. So I told her to create a “buzzword” around that particular style. One she can easily claims as her own and make it part of her personal brand.

She may not have been the first person to do use that style… but dammit I’m gonna make sure baby sis will be the first person to get know for it. This similar to the story of Schlitz beer and Claude Hopkins in the twenties.

Schlitz beer was FAR behind when it came to sales when compared to it’s competition so they hired advertising god Claude Hopkins and brought him to their factory. After seeing how the beer is treated and sheer amount of care that goes into each bottle, Hopkins asked the factory owners why they never told anyone about how much work that into the booze.

Their answer?

Something along the lines of:

“Well all the competition does it… this is pretty much the industry standard process… why should we bother telling the customer about it? ”

And just like that sir Hopkins got his Big Idea for the ad.

His ad told the story of how the booze was made. Ever though technically EVERYONE ELSE used the exact same standards and process for their own beer… Schlitz was the first company that became known for it.

Same thing I want my sister to do.

And so far a few older women she hangs with are already stealing her style. Her reach is growing. And I see a good future for her.

Moral of all this?

Find the one thing nobody talks about in your industry and bring it to the forefront. Even if it’s a mundane detail nobody talks about and it’s boring to you… it won’t be boring to the customer.

Especially in this day and age of jaded and skeptical customers whose attention span is harder to catch than a fish in a polluted lake.

That being said if you want me to find the juicy details that’ll arrest your customer’s attention and bring them to the forefront of your next campaign… go apply here for a quick 30 minute Skype call where we see if we’re a good fit.

jaymakoni.com/work-with-me

And I’ll get back to you.

Till the next wave of madness… Vae Victis

-Jay

“On with the show”

07 July 2017 by James Makoni 1 Comment

“Because it works” is not an acceptable excuse

Two weeks back I got into a mini internet shouting match with fellow marketer.

The whole thing ended on an good note. I still like and respect the fellow and he’s given me fucktons of good advice. I love that guy ( no homo ) but I still don’t agree with a few points of his argument.

We had mini quarrel after I posted a Status on Ye Olde Facebook… making fun of how Ghuruz rent mansions and expensive cars to create false images of high profile lifestyles to sell a false dream to their prospects.

His argument was that all marketing is deception one way or another and that it’s necessary to do this. THIS I did not agree with.

His argument further went to explain how this was a minority occurrence in the internet marketing world. And yes, I can agree with that to a certain extent.

His argument went on to explain that the reason he did it was to enhance the experience of his seminar goers. I can agree with that. It’s perfectly acceptable to package your services to increase their perceived value.

If you can give someone a good time while they’re working with you and you deliver genuine value then GO FOR IT!

What I do NOT agree with, is trying to portray a false vision of how one lives to sell that same false dream to others.

Now, I know what you’re thinking.

The reason why people do this is “it works”.

“it fucking works”.

Wow…Now, tell me something…

If your excuse for using these deceptive strategies is:

“because it works”, then let’s look at how that excuse applies in other circumstances.

Why do thieves break into people’s homes and steal from them? Because it works?

Why do thugs beat the crap out of you… leave you half dead… and run off with your wallet? Because it works?

Why do terrorists use guns instead of stones to mow down innocent bystanders in the name of a faulty belief? Because it works?

Why do rapists force themselves on defenceless women and steal sexual gratification from them? Because it works? And you cannot argue with me about either of these examples… especially the fourth one. We have enough crime stats to show that THIS SHIT WORKS.

Now, tell me something.

Just because any of this stuff works… does that make it right?

No.

It doesn’t.

Just because something works does NOT make it right.

Just because something works does NOT make it ethical.

Now, at the end of the day the onus is on you to decide what you’re going to do. If you’re reading my shit that clearly means you’re a smart marketer. That also means you’re going to focus on doing what works.

But, is what you’re doing the right thing?

Is it something you’d be okay with having someone else do to one of your loved ones? Think about it.

That is all.

If you want email marketing strategies that not only work… but are also ethical and socially acceptable then him me up and let’s talk about your business. Go enter your detail here:

https://jaymakoni.com/work-with-me

And I’ll get back to ya.

Till the next wave of madness… Vae Victis.

-Jay

“On with show”